Rearviewmirror: Remembering the 90s – The Vandals – Oi To The World!

90s Score: 8/10
2020 Score: 8/10

‘Twas the end of 2020, that year full of bunk
And I was listening to music to deal with my funk
The Lizard Queen asked me to write for Bucketlist Reviews
Including this Rearviewmirror, but what album do I choose?
Do I pick a classic? A hit? Or some hidden gem?
Or do I go with an album I’ve played again and again?
“It’s Christmas!” I exclaimed as I put on my hat
But there was no one there, so I just confused my cat
“I should attempt to spread some holiday cheer
And pick a fun album to see out the end of the year”
At that moment a fitting idea had unfurled
As I chose to review The Vandals’ Xmas release Oi To The World!

I thought to myself that this should be fun
And the first song is about protecting your gifts with a gun!
It features the amazing writing of guitarist Warren Fitzgerald
And Dave Quackenbush’s vocals sound like God’s own herald
(Well, not really, I just needed to make things rhyme
This is harder than it looks, you should try it sometime)
I can guarantee you’ve never heard a holiday release quite like this
I mean, it has a track called “Christmas Time For My Penis”!
Much of the album maintains a style that is fun and upbeat
Granted some may question the lyrics, but I just think they’re neat
The slower songs are tongue-in-cheek, or at least their meant to be
Like the sombre, acoustic “Hang Myself From The Tree”

All the songs are meant in fun to give the band a cheap thrill
So you may as well check it out if you’ve got a half hour to kill
“But they’re making light of the holiday season!” some may complain
Well, I think life’s too short to take things so seriously so don’t be a pain
This release, just like life, is meant to be fun
So shove your stuffy solemn expectations right up your bum
In standard Vandals’ style, this album is sloppy with quirks
As it’s meant to put a smile on your face, you uptight jerks
The album is heavily laced with loads of juvenile humour
Which is just what we need as 2020 has dread as a steady loomer
So if you’re a fan of goofy punk and low-brow jokes
Then give this a try, but maybe not in front of your folks
That sums up my review and I hope I did alright

So happy holidays to all and to all I don’t recommend that you ever try to write a review in rhyming couplets. That shit’s hard. Fuck.

Written by Ted Berger
*edited by Chris Aitkens

About Ted Berger 19 Articles
Saskatchewan-born and Prairie-raised, Ted is a Calgary based weirdo who, in spite of being tall, bald, bearded, and bespectacled with primary interests in metal and comics, along with other nerd shit, is not actually Brian Posehn...probably. Music has surrounded him since a young age; growing up at all ages venues seeing local punk bands, to helping out at independent music stores, travelling vast distances for shows, and eventually fronting a couple bands prior to his move to Alberta. His tastes are even more diverse and weird as those two acts (Screamo act Chapel Hill and experimental Death-Grind act Cupcake) with his playlist regularly changing from stoner to grind to midwestern emo to hip hop to skate punk to noise to Taylor Swift (yes, she’s a genre on her own - don’t @ me).

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