Why can’t we disconnect at shows anymore?

Is it too much to ask for you to shut the fuck up a little bit? Okay, maybe that was a little harsh. Let me start again; a few months ago, I went to Toronto, ON to see Chelsea Wolfe, one of my favourite artists of all time, play an intimate acoustic show, promoting the release of her latest album, Birth of Violence. For anyone that’s attended a softer acoustic show, you know that some of the most special highlights come from the quiet moments; when you can hear the strum of a guitar so clearly and the vocals echoing throughout the entire room that it gives you chills.

So, I really don’t need to hear you talk about how you prefer her older stuff to her newer stuff. Or how your boss was super annoying today. Or how you wish you had worn a lighter jacket to the show. You know what those are called? Inside thoughts. Keep it in your head, please.

All I’m asking is for you to read the room, you know? Be considerate of others that are there to enjoy the music. If you really need to urgently talk to the person you’re with, maybe consider heading to the back of the room, or better yet, leaving altogether. And if you’re not a huge fan of the artist and are just there for a night out to drink and chat with your pals, maybe don’t take up a spot close to the front.

What baffles me the most is why anyone would buy a ticket, go to a venue, and spend so much time doing anything aside from watching the ACTUAL show?


Don’t get me wrong, I enjoy taking concert videos and sharing them on Instagram for friends to see. I might capture 30 seconds of a song or two. But it doesn’t make sense when I see someone spending more than half the show recording from their phone. One of the most powerful and intense performances I witnessed in 2019 was Lingua Ignota. I can’t imagine having looked away from her performance for even a second to go bathroom, let alone send a text that could wait until the end of the damn show.

So, here is my real question: why is it that people can’t disconnect anymore? And before anyone goes ahead and calls it a generational thing; no, it’s not. I’ve seen teens and adults alike act like this at shows. It’s disrespectful to the fans who bought tickets and the artists themselves to be giving them anything but your undivided attention.

Alright, I’m going to leave it there. You know who you are. Just try and be a little respectful of your fellow music. Chances are if you’re at a brutal deathcore show or something, you won’t be able to hear each other talk anyway. But if not, read the room a little first before you decide to shout at your friend about your shitty co-workers.

Written by Dominic Abate
*edited by Danielle Kenedy

About Dominic Abate 86 Articles
Dominic's first love of music came at an early age, when his father introduced him to the sounds of bands like The Beatles and The Doors. It inspired him to learn how to play guitar and constantly seek out new music. Although Dominic loves nearly all forms of music, his primary passion is anything with heavy and loud guitars. His current favourites are bands/artists like Chelsea Wolfe, Converge, Pallbearer, Amenra and Behemoth, just to name a few. When he's not writing for Bucketlist, Dominic works as a Marketing Copywriter.

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